How Was Your Saturday?

Mine was good, for the most part.

Jim, as you may or may not know, is a self-proclaimed comic book geek. He's not so fond of the new stuff, but he loves what he calls "his comics." The Batman and Superman of his youth. He's been an avid collector most of his life. Or I should say was an avid collector. He really doesn't buy any more unless it's to resell. Several years ago, he acquired a huge collection from a dealer who was retiring. He's been selling this collection off on Ebay. We did a few local comic book shows when he first got the collection, but they weren't very successful. The man who ran the local shows (twice a year) didn't do a very good job. He retired and there's a new guy in town. Well, he's not actually local, but he has started running the two shows a year here. Jim went to the one last spring to check it out. When the post card came in the mail a few weeks ago to let us know it was coming up, Jim decided to buy a table, set up, and see what happened.

The show was yesterday from 10:00am to 4:00pm. Set up began at 8:00am. We were there bright and early ready to go. The guy who ran the show didn't show up until 8:30am. Not a great start, but no big deal for us since we only had one table. Jim unloaded the car, then I ran to McDonald's to buy breakfast. I was very excited to see a drive-thru Starbucks in the same parking lot as the hotel. I was able to start my day with my favorite venti non-fat mocha, no whip. I was back from the breakfast run in 15 minutes, and Jim was already set up.

My role at these shows is to run get and get food, provide Jim with company, and cover the table when he goes to the bathroom or walks the room for a break. Oh, and I chat with the customers and make small talk. We had a good day at the show. We made one really nice sale to a customer. The rest of the customers who came in bought a $2.00 book here or a $5.00 book there. Nothing too big. We did well selling to other dealers though. Most of the men who set up at these events are interesting characters. This may be their livelihood, or it maybe their way to feed their own habit. They ranged from the guy who wore the decades old faded House of Blues t-shirt and sweatpants to the guy wearing khaki cargo shorts with a long-sleeved, plaid button-down shirt and his very preppy haircut. The customers were 8-year-old boys, college professors, blue-collar workers, college athletes, the 6'7"ish bald man with the long black coat, a goatee that reached down to mid-chest, and piercings. Most of the women who come in the room are there with one of the guys, but they are fans, too. The main thing I enjoy about the shows is the people watching. You have never seen such a wide range of humanity in your life.


I didn't bring the camera, so this isn't our show. I found this picture online, but it's a pretty good representation of what it was like.

We're pretty known in the local comic book community. Jim has been a part of it since long before he knew me. It's no secret that we're adopting from China. Everyone knows we've been involved in the process for a long time. It is also known that the proceeds from what Jim sells is helping to finance our adoption. In fact, yesterday's proceeds are going towards paying for our new immigration approval request. We saw people yesterday that we see often and know that we're close. We also saw people we hadn't see in years and were excited to hear that we're finally getting close. And we also saw this guy...



I have named him butt-face because he talks out of his butt. This was the obnoxious man who ran the show. He just felt compelled to keep coming to our table and talking to me. Each time, he managed to offend me, and I don't easily offend. These were just some of the gems he shared with me:

"You're being adopted? You look almost old enough to be out on your own. Are you looking for a sugar-daddy?"

"I know! You're adopting from China because you need more workers to set up at these shows. You know the Chinese work for cheap. That's why they brought them all to San Francisco to build the railroad. See, you didn't know how smart I was. I know history."

"I had a friend who kind of adopted. He travelled through Russia and Kazakhstan until he found a 17-year-old girl. He waited until she was 18 and married her. When his daughter, who was two years older complained, he told her that she had always wanted a little sister. She p*ssed through his money in three years and took off."

"When you go to China, do you have to take a whole baby?" I'll admit that I gave him a baffled look on this one because I had no idea where he was going.
"Or are you just getting inseminated with a Chinese baby there? You know, like when you buy a frozen pizza and then have to bake it in your own oven."

Periodically throughout the afternoon, he would pass our table, stop, and toss one of these at me. Each time I was dumbstruck. I would just look at him with a horrified "you're an idiot" look, and he would go away. I have got to work on some comebacks. I swear, though, each time he said something it was so horrific that I would just blank.

This man will not meet our child.